Today is Valentine’s Day.
As a child, I rather dreaded this day as would have to
laboriously write 30 names of my fellow students on their cards. I did however cherish the cards I
received in return and still have some from 1983 in my memory box. Cards can make you feel so very
wanted and loved.
As I worked this year with my son Isaac on his Valentine’s
cards for his third grade classmates, we discussed the many ways he could show
his friends that he cared for them.
We also began a rather deep conversation about subtext. We talked about the facing message that
is obvious in a card but there is often a deeper subtle message underneath.
In February of 2013, I began a campaign on Change.org and on Twitter to
encourage Hallmark to have a line of hospice cards. The idea came out of a tweet chat that TedMed hosted that
year. Major media sites
reported the campaign that spring.
Hallmark did consider my proposal and made their search engine a bit
more user friendly for families looking for cards appropriate for hospice, but
they did not create a hospice card.
A competitor, Greeting Card Universe, ended up making 24 different types
of hospice cards in the spring of 2013.
When I attended HIMSS in Louisiana
in March 2013, I brought materials to begin creating
a large hospice card prototype for Hallmark. So many people who attended the Patient Engagement Track
signed the inset that would accompany the card.
When The Walking Gallery gathered on June 2, 2013 in Washington, DC attendees from all over the nation signed the card insert we planed to give to Hallmark.
When I spoke at
KUMC in Kansas City, Kansas in September 2013, I brought the card elements with
me. With help from the amazing
folks at KUMC we assembled the card right there in Kansas only miles away from
Hallmark Headquarters.
My dear friend Jari Holland Buck, Walking Gallery Member and patient advocate took the
over-sized card to the Hallmark Headquarters in September 2014. We had tried to arrange an official
hand-off in 2013 but were unsuccessful.
At approximately 11:30 am Central time, September 5, 2014, Jari delivered
the hospice card we assembled at KU Medical Center. Jari did try to find the
“right” person to accept delivery of the card to no avail. She hoped a spontaneous visit would net
results.
Prior to arriving,
Jari verified that they still lacked an identified presence in the hospice
cards. Their website stated the following, "These cards are available within several
different lines in any store that carries Hallmark products. But because
they haven't typically been displayed together, and because not every
store offering Hallmark products carries every card we produce, these cards can
be difficult to find. Late last year we began offering new displays to group
these cards in a "tough times" zone with signs to help shoppers find
them. These new sections will be appearing in many Hallmark Gold Crown stores
throughout 2013."
The front desk security guard asked Jari to leave the card
as she was making an “unscheduled delivery.” Jari refused, saying that there
was too much pain and too many people behind this gesture to simply pass this
work to Hallmark anonymously.
Jari suggested
several possible recipients to the security guard. The security guard responded
that she didn’t have the names or roles of department employees. Jari suggested
that Media Relations might be a good direction.
Linda Odell, (whom responded to my initial request via
several reporters in 2013) Manager of Media Relations, personally accepted
delivery of the card.
This is what Jari told Ms. Odell:
“My name is Jari Holland Buck. I am a Patient Advocate and member of
Regina Holliday’s Walking Gallery. I am here today on behalf of all hospice
patients, past, present and future, as well as the family members who care
about and the caregivers who care for them. Facing death is one of the most
difficult challenges any of us will face, whether it is ours or that of someone
else.
Hallmark has helped us with our inability to express the right message
and continues to do so by offering cards that are “appropriate” for those in
hospice. When I walk into a Hallmark store to purchase a hospice card, this is
not a fun trip. I do not wish to search through the racks or be escorted by an
employee who may or may not know where to source the appropriate card on the
racks. This is hard enough for me to acknowledge and I just want to get in and
get out. Hallmark has neither
clustered these cards in a meaningful way in the stores nor offered a line
specifically dedicated to this painful experience.
On behalf of Regina Holliday, members of the Patient Advocacy Walking
Gallery, our local community and caregivers throughout the US, please accept
“our” card asking you to dedicate your time and attention to this issue.”
Ms. Odell responded that she was working on correspondence
with www.caringbridge.org/ for a co-branded
line of cards. She was working on
this at the very moment she was contacted by the security guard and thought the
timing was fortuitous. Jari asked if Ms. Odell if she was aware of my petition and
she said, “Yes. Regina was the one who initiated the change.org petition for
hospice cards.”
Ms. Odell stated that hospice cards were still not grouped within
Hallmark stores and was aware that there had been “issues” with shelf talkers /
inserts that identified their presence within the racks.
Jari told Ms. Odell that she was serving as an advocate for a hospice
patient. Jari knew, from personal experience, what it was like to visit a
Hallmark store seeking these cards. Jari explained how awkward many of her client’s
friends and family members felt expressing themselves to the dying patient.
Ms. Odell acknowledged that the point “This is not a happy trip to the
card store and I am not here to shop or laugh,” was a valid one and one
not previously considered to her knowledge.
She also said she knew 15 people who needed to see the card. They were
spread widely throughout the organization. Ms. Odell then asked for a copy of
Jari’s explanation of the card, which Jari willingly provided.
Today is Valentine’s Day and Jari sent me a card. I don’t get many cards on Valentines
day and I thank Jari for being such a great friend. Her card encouraged me to write this post today and report on
the Hospice Card saga of the past 2 years.
Which encouraged me to think about subtext.
I realized that I began demanding cards for our loved ones who are
dying in February the month of Valentine’s Day.
I am a Widow. This is a hard month for me. My thoughts turn to love and loss. My request to Hallmark is that same as it
was two years ago. Help make a
time that is so very sad be filled with love. I don’t want a memory box just filled with Valentines. I want to see some hospice cards.
So I write this post today and will tag it with #HealthPolicyValentines.
Be the change you wish to see. Never forget you can change health policy with a simple greeting card.
